Today has been a trying day. The older Madelyn gets the more often she realizes that she can choose whether or not to obey her Mommy and Daddy. Today, with almost every task, Madelyn has chosen to kick and scream and cry. From the first diaper change of the day, to getting dressed, to waiting for her breakfast, to you name it, Madelyn has decided not to be patient, not to be joyful, not to obey. When met with each tantrum my first heart response is anger. “What has happened to my content, joyful, obedient little girl?? I WANT HER BACK!” That is quickly followed by unbelief. “How can I possibly be the type of mother that God wants me to be to my little girl?” Thankfully, with each tantrum, God has not allowed me to stay there in those thoughts. He has reminded me of a quote that I heard this weekend at a women’s seminar held by the church I attend.
“Boundaries are not determined by giftedness or even opportunity but by divine assignment.” –Dorothy Patterson
Shannon, our pastor’s wife and a dear friend of mine, continued by encouring the ladies that “with divine assignment comes divine grace.” Yes! This is what I so desperately need…divine grace! God knows that I cannot, in my own ability or strength, be the type of mother that Madelyn needs. And God, in His kindness, does not allow me to walk through motherhood alone; He has given me His divine grace. It is comforting to know that though I lack the giftedness to be the mother I desire to be, it is not by chance that Madelyn is my daughter. God has divinely appointed her as my daughter–for my good, for her good, and most imporantly, for His glory. So, regardless of the type of Madelyn I meet after she wakes from her morning nap, I am encouraged to know it is the exact Madelyn that God wants me to love, care for, and train. Thank you God, for you ever-abundant grace! Your strength is made perfect in my weakness!